November Winds

Each year, I fight against the Solstice tide
find my way out of its darkness – once more.
One moment I am moving forward – then
memory spins me around, throws me back.

A draft of leaves offers me direction
carries my gaze skyward from horizon
to clear blue – the beauty of autumn comes
through in red-yellow-gold fractured patterns.

Then, no longer shadow-bound, I step in
color-deep sidewalks, slip from rain puddle
to puddle. Emotions swirl together
leaving me lightheaded, tossed like a leaf

in November winds. Sunshine confuses
heartaches from the past – leaving them behind.

~ Siobhan
11/20/13

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I rolled over last night and thought
– for a second –
you were there.
I wanted you
to ease the knots from my shoulders,
rub my ankles and toes
as only you can.
Something about your touch
relaxes me
while it excites me.

I knew you
were not there
beside me;
just pillows
that no longer carry your scent
stacked for me to hold on to
when missing you becomes a little too much
more than I can handle.

I didn’t fall
back to sleep
right away.
You occupied that space
in my mind
and I allowed myself
to remember enough
to fall asleep again
a smile curving my lips
as if kissed
by you.

~

Siobhan
03.25.13


Can you see through me?
A whisper of memory
all that remains here.

~

Chills run down my spine
even with the sun shining
Winter hasn’t thawed.

~

I don’t mind being
in the same place, the same time
I’m invisible

~
Siobhan
3/14/13


Pictures of You and Me

Jazz on the radio, background music
for chores and a day-dreaming afternoon.
House warmed by the smell of freshly baked bread,
dog asleep in his recliner, twitching,
and me with a cuppa, thinking of you.

Elsewhere, you rummage through a life on film;
images captured from happier days
and those when your smiles were free and easy.
Those black and white snapshots – you serious,
handsome; our private kiss while still in bed,
me in sunset, waist deep in the ocean,

each remain a framed memory of then…

I wonder if you linger on any –
maybe even pictures of you and me.

~
Siobhan
2/3/13


Smile

She rolls over in bed at the soft sound …
his voice; it’s not close – perhaps not even
really there. A conversational tone
with a hint of laughter. Her lips curving
to a smile in her half-awake sleep state.

A smile of memory, a smile of her
remembered desire. As her mind wakes
to it, the smile fades a little – yet
it doesn’t disappear. He hasn’t gone;
just vanished from her immediate life.

He hovers around the edges, a piece
of past she hasn’t let go of – hasn’t
wanted to let go of…not yet – maybe
never. She still holds on – to his smile.

~
Siobhan
1/12/13


Forgotten Enough

Each stroke becomes a slap, the sting of words
bruises flesh just caressed; desire’s ache
turns to ire and passion dissipates.
Her body is, being freely given
to him,
questioned at its curves. Attraction
seen in another’s eyes sparks suspicion.

Platitudes of trust ring hollow, she is
faithful; he has few doubts, it’s not in her
he sees deceit – so he says.  Be patient.
Past lives haunt them with cruel memory;
each has given, only one forgiven
(or forgotten) enough to start anew.

Yesterday’s misery destroys today,
they pay the price of loving and losing.

~
Siobhan
11/15/12


and those will go on forever…

She thought they were finished, over and done
now she finds him on the periphery.
An invisible thread, unbreakable,
binds them together longer and stronger
than either vow or subsequent decree.

Strung along in life, now hung alone, she
cannot curse her own actions. She once thought
forever was forever was ever,
would always be; displeasure fills her, then
memories held deep inside take over
and her body – her heart – scream foul play.

It’s possible to have loved, desired,
and still cherish the passion and friendship
once shared… And those will go on forever.

~
Siobhan
6/21/12